The Basics: How (and when) to Write a Thank You Letter

One of the greatest feelings of achievement I get is when I type up a letter, take it in for signing and whoever I am working for  just signs it. No corrections, no changes or re-working of wording… just a signature… In my years and years of producing letters for other people I am glad to say that (eventually) this happened with increasing frequency and with no diminished feeling of triumph!

"Thank You" letters are a very good place to start achieving this yourself. Hopefully this how-to will help you to get there just a little more quickly than I did!
 

Never under estimate the power of a well-placed vote of thanks.  A number of the VIPs I have worked for recognise this and, I am of the belief that this is one of the details that keeps the regard held for them so high.

Regardless of the medium you use an “appropriate” thanks will not go unnoticed or without a smile of appreciation.

Appropriate is the key here. It is appropriate to thank someone when they have hosted an event (e.g. a cocktail party, dinner, sporting event, ball etc.), sent a gift, responded to an appeal for help or gone beyond the call of duty in anyway. This applies in all areas of life, not least in business.

There are a number of guides out there regarding when it is appropriate to send a business related "Thank You" letter or email after a job interview. In my opinion it is NEVER appropriate to thank someone for interviewing you. Even if you really want the job, it is the mark of a sycophant (needy person) and who wants to employ such a person  - even as an Assistant? Anything that could be construed as "Please like me" is unprofessional. Have the confidence to know that you have responded to someone's need when attending an interview and that they should be thanking you for your time. Conversely, it IS appropriate to thank anyone who may have been involved in making the introduction that lead to the interview, regardless of the outcome. If you have networked your way into such a situation, those in your network deserve a line or two via email, and if you get the job - the drinks are on you!

 
Thankfully, in the realms of what is and is not socially acceptable there are some clear rules you can follow that (like a knee length hem-line) will never cause you or the person you represent any embarrassment:

I believe that you should thank in the medium in which the invitation was made. For example, if you receive a formal thick card, embossed invitation (rather affectionately known in more than one London office as a “stiffy”) which has a handwritten name on it then it is appropriate for the guest to write a handwritten reply on their own personal headed paper.

Accepting the invitation is a different matter. Most formal invitations will come with a reply card that involves you filling in the information and sending it back. All invitations will include instructions as to how to RSVP (Respond). You should follow these instructions (especially if you’re accepting the invitation) as this is the easiest way for the host to compile responses.

If the invitation was via email then it is acceptable to send a thank you in the same way. However, if the invitation is to a formal or very special event, such as something which is part of “The Season” (i.e. Ascot, Henley, Glyndebourne, Wimbledon and various other outdoor events) or includes a titled* host or guest of honour then a written letter reply is appropriate.

If an invitation makes use of a formal title such as “Sir” or “The Rt. Hon” or even "His/Her Royal Highness" on the invitation this indicates that the host is keen to show that it is a formal occasion so any thanks should be sent in formally.

Traditional form suggests that if the invitation is personal and to a couple that the lady of the couple is responsible for producing a letter of thanks and such a reply should be directed to the lady of the hosting couple at their home address. This is terribly formal, rather old fashioned and largely out of your hands, even if you are a home office or “Personal” Assistant. In your capacity as an Assistant in the work-place there is a slightly less formal, but no less important process to follow.

Usually, business related entertainment that is directed to the person you are working for along with their partner will be sent to the business address (rather than their home).  In the case of a business invitation directed solely at your boss you will simply need to ask if they would like to send thanks. They will need to be involved in the process and it is always best to ask if you don’t know!

You could structure your letter like this:

1. “Thank you for....” – this is the purpose of the letter and should be stated immediately
2. Personal detail – this shows a great level of detail and therefore appreciation for the host’s efforts.
3. What I/we liked about what you did for us – as above and shows that the writer is keen to nurture the relationship.
4. Allude to the future – this is a positive way to conclude and can also be non-committal.

 An example of a generic business thank you letter:

It should be sent no later than the Monday after the event (to arrive on the Tuesday) or if your boss is travelling it should be waiting for signature upon their return. If there is a gap longer than a week between those days reference to the “lateness” of the thanks should be made in the first paragraph of the letter e.g. “Please forgive the time it has taken for me to thank you for including me/us <<etc>> I have been out of the country....".

I owe a great deal of this knowledge and the accomplishment of the finer details to Debrett’s. This is the definitive guide to getting things right in the minefield of communication and they now have a great deal of this information available on line. For me though, my copy of “Correct Form” is well thumbed and considered an office essential.

These tips should get you through the fear of the blank page staring back at your when you boss asks you to "Sort out a Thank You letter for...." Anticipating this need when you diarise and accept an invitation is a great way to demonstrate pro-active thinking. Set a reminder in your own diary, produce the letter in a timely matter, pop it in the signing book and your boss will start to think you're psychic!